New Year's Resolution #1: Slow down, babe.

For many of us, 2009 wasn't an easy year. So far, I can’t say 2010 is remarkably better; in fact I feel even more exhausted lately. But for working moms, is life ever easy? Sure, it's rewarding, to work in a job that you (mostly) love and to have an active hand in raising your kids and being deeply involved in their sweet and sometimes cranky little selves. I feel lucky to "have it all." Yet sometimes I need to take a step back and make sure that I am not trying to do everything 110%. There's a danger in that. A good friend of mine recently shared her struggles from overdoing it:

"As for me, after learning that I officially stressed and fatigued my adrenals and messed up my electrolytes, all of which was contributing to many other medical issues, I have/am learning to slow down and not take on too much all the time. Be careful -- true adrenal fatigue is almost becoming an epidemic with women 30-50."

Even though the Mayo Clinic website says that "adrenal fatigue" is not an acceptable medical diagnosis, I do believe my friend when she tells me that her body has suffered from stress and now that she has changed her lifestyle by doing less, eating better, and drinking less alcohol and caffeine, she feels like a new person.

For myself, I know that I am susceptible to stress and will suffer from lack of regular exercise and too many late nights at the computer. In my early 20s, I had a serious spell of depression that put me into the hospital for a bit. Since then, I've always been highly cognizant of my limits. Taking it easy, however, doesn't exactly jive with my genes; I am a person of many ambitions and interests, bred from a hard-charging woman who is a type-A doer. Yet, I know when to say no. I volunteer a few times a month in my daughter's classroom but on some days I just have to e-mail the teacher and apologize that I am not going to make it. I try and purge all guilt from my head after doing so, even though I know how much these teachers need and appreciate the help. Okay, stop, I'm doing it again. No guilt, I said no guilt!

But ultimately, I know the consequences of stuffing my schedule too tight: I get panicky, exceptionally snippy with the kids and hubby, angry, frustrated, and then I don't sleep well. I'm an exercise fanatic, but I have to accept the fact that sometimes a 20-minute walk with my dog is going to have to suffice instead of a trip to the gym. (The beauty of that is, my dog is very happy with the choice) Life happens. Sometimes you just have to roll with it and accept a lower standard, despite whatever impossibly high standards you have set for yourself.

All of us need to learn to recognize and honor the warning signs: consistent changes in appetite, sleep patterns, mood, motivation, and sociability. When I am overly-frazzled and overdone altogether, I simply don't want to be around other people. I don't care how fun and cute they are. Deep down inside I can hear my inner voice chanting: "Come on, get dressed, have fun, get out there." When I just can't do it, I know it's time to scale back. Do you?

Frazzled friends, I welcome your coping strategies for when life seems overwhelming. I'm never going to achieve everything that I want to, because I fear the consequences of doing and doing until I am brain dead. In the meantime, remember, these feelings of inadequacy too shall pass. On that note, I'm shutting off the computer, eating a brownie, taking a bath, and going to bed early. I think.