Monday, July 18, 2011

The Home Office: Haven or Hell?

You happily left the serenity of your air conditioned office to work from home, so you could have more quality time with the kids. Now instead of the boss, the little monsters are yanking your chain. Did you make a big, sticky mistake?

Today, my friend Howard shared with me a San Jose Mercury News story about the challenges of stay-at-home working parents. I don't know why he thinks I would care -- after all, it's not like I work at home and have two loud youngsters or anything. Oh, wait. It was the dream I had two nights ago about working in a quiet office wearing grown-up clothes that was untrue.

On most days, I wouldn't give up my situation for anything. Instead of spending two hours a day dressing, primping and driving to and from an office, I maximize time with my kids. I get to go to their swim meets and baseball practices and help them with homework after school. I save money on gas and nice outfits. I am my own boss and for the most part, set my own schedule. I almost never have to attend a useless meeting instead of working out.

Even so, summertime has reminded me how distracting and unproductive working at home with kids can be at times -- even, or perhaps because of, hiring babysitters. Here's an interesting quote from the Mercury News article: “A recent study by TheBump.com and Forbes Woman showed that, while 92 percent of working moms are stressed out, 89 percent of stay-at-home moms feel the same way. Parents say much of the stress comes from trying to give both work and kids enough time, especially when children are used to getting attention when mom is around.”

Kids find you like a heat-seeking missile when you least expect nor want them. They are genetically wired to interrupt you during an important business call or deadline with a screaming crisis concerning misplaced items or a dessert emergency. The worst arguments between siblings always seem to happen when you're swamped. Babysitters are by and large inept at keeping children occupied with acceptable activities and out of parents’ offices, unless they are over the age of 25, and with significant life experience. Good luck there! Grandmothers are often not much better. The smart, creative, nurturing, patient and highly responsible babysitters are usually former teachers and you can't afford their (deserved, granted) astronomical hourly rates. To be blunt: sometimes it's a real pain in the ass to work from home.

Sadly, I have no advice to share about this, after five years of doing it. But if you're a parent and thinking about giving up the office job for the blessed home-office gig, think twice. Do you have the balls to maintain discipline, clarity of purpose, and when needed, install and use the lock on your office door? Can you discover a coping method for the madness of working when the kids are home, other than twisting opening a bottle of Jack?

If so, enjoy the ride. It's fun, rewarding, and challenging to work from home -- but it's rarely smooth.